This is what is on my mind at the moment. It is what I was thinking about at 4:30am after I did my check on the family rounds. I started writing about how I got to the space I am in right now but I have not finished that yet. When I do I will share. For now lets just say that I was feeling very stressed out. this is something that I think almost everyone can relate to.
I have been reading a lot, talking to a lot of folks and thinking a lot about how we get so stressed out with worry and life. I do not believe that life is supposed to be miserable or painful, nor do I believe that it should be foot loose and fancy free. as always somewhere in the middle is where it should fall.
I would like to share some of my thoughts with you in regards to living with intention, simplicity and stress. My current thoughts regarding my stress and the stress of those I interact with is that we have an overly high opinion of what we can control. I remember being pregnant with Little and thinking wow this is really animalistic. My body is doing strange things, I don’t get to know the timeline or end date. It is what it is and Nature will take its course. Something I forgot or pushed to the back of my mind as soon as she was born and I was emerged in the “crisis reaction” instead of the thinking action. Now I have my mothers health to worry about and I realize that I can help but I cannot control the outcome. The more I look at things the more I realize that I cant control them. The beautiful part about this is that knowing that means that I am not responsible for them! I therefor do not have to stress about them. This seems simple but it was a huge eye opener as I took a step back from my life and really looked at what I can control and what I am responsible for.
In this process of stepping back and examining my life I started reading:
Simplicity Parenting: Using the Extraordinary Power of Less to Raise Calmer, Happier, and More Secure Kids [Book] by Kim John Payne, Lisa M. Ross
We have had some fairly significant stressers enter Little’s life in the past year and I was looking for a way to ease her stress. There was a line in this book that talked about how before you had kids you imagined how your life would be. You dreamed the dream of what your family would look like. Well shoot I forgot that step. In fact I realized in a lot of ways I just took things on as they came up in my life. I planned the daily and weekly tasks but I forgot to look at the over all picture. I have not been living a life of intention. (By the way I like the book though I am not through it yet. When I finish I will give you my review.)
So for now I am looking at my life and asking if the various pieces fit into the intention that I have for my life and for our life as a family. I have noticed that so far I am calmer and of course I have less stress. I can also (try to) take a step back and look at the newest crisis and think what do I want the long term outcome to be. How can this be handled with in my frame of values. I am also now taking the time to dream and dream out loud with my hubby. What do we want our lives to look like? How do we envision our family? what about in five years?
Have any of you done this? What are your thoughts? what did you come up with for simplifying your life?